My Journey to Texas: Grief

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A week ago I found myself sitting on my bed at my mom’s condo quietly grieving the life that I was about to leave. I had had plenty of goodbye dinners, lunches, parties, and coffees. I had sold most of my worldly possessions. I had even packed up my Chevy Tahoe with everything I did own to be able to start my journey the next morning as early as possible.You’d think by now it would have set in that I was moving to Texas.

Yet it wasn’t until I found myself alone, in my room, right as I laid down to go to bed the night before I was to embark on the journey that I began to truly grieve the life that I was leaving. It’s something I’ll never forget. I sat on the edge of my bed and quietly cried as I thought of everything I left behind. The words to the old country song, “How Can I Help You Say Goodbye” by Patty Loveless played in my head.

I knew deep down I was making the right decision but in that very moment I questioned everything that I was about to do. I texted one of my closest friends and asked for some prayers as I really didn’t know what else to do or say. I tried to pray but really there were no words. Then I realized I just had to left this happen – I had to work through the grief of what I was about to do. I knew that if I didn’t process this that it would just make the move all that much harder.

When I thought about this whole move I never thought about grieving the chapter of my life that I was closing up. I feel like throughout my life I’ve moved through “seasons” or had “chapters” open and close but never in my life have I had something so huge where I felt like it was so defined. So different than other “seasons” or “chapters” in my life ending.

The move wasn’t a negative one at all so I figured there would be no reason to have such sad feelings. I learned quickly I was wrong. I think somewhere in my mind I felt like I was abandoning everyone in my life. I’d like to think that I’m not a selfish person and what I was about to do felt so selfish because it was for me and me alone. Yet, I think in the end this move to Texas will be good for me and truly is what I want but it’s still hard to tell yourself that you’re doing the right thing.

On the other hand I knew that I was leaving with everyone’s blessing. I learned quickly that when you move away like this you really don’t want people to be happy to see you leave but you want them to be happy for you. Thankfully most all of my friends and family were good about articulating these feelings and I had to remind myself that everyone was truly happy for me and that it’s ok to take that leap to head to Texas…

After thinking through all this and more I was able to finally calm myself down and fall asleep. It seemed like I had just barely closed my eyes when suddenly my 5:00AM alarm was going off. I laid there staring at the ceiling. I had to will myself out of bed to get showed and on the road.

After gathering my things and saying my goodbyes to my mom and my grandma I got in my truck and began the 1400 mile journey from Columbus to San Antonio…


 

My Journey to Texas

This is going to be a small four part series chronicling my move process and the various stages. Being one of the biggest things that has ever taken place in my life I wanted to blog about it to share with everyone as well as for my own memories to look back on.

  1. Grief
  2. Drive
  3. Dallas
  4. Start

 

John’s Moving to Texas – The FAQ

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John The Texan

This last week has been exhausting. I’ve been trying to explain to everyone that I know that I’m moving to Texas at the end of the month. So, I’ve compiled a FAQ to help answer some questions since they seem to be the same ones. I hope you enjoy reading them and feel free to ask others in the comments!

In case we’re not friends on Facebook… here’s the message I left there:

I guess it’s time for me to make this Facebook official. Last week I put in my one month notice at my job and in the beginning of March I will be moving to San Antonio, TX. It’s been a tough decision for me but I feel like for this time in my life – it’s where I need to be. I’m going to miss all of you in Ohio (and Michigan) a ton! I hope you all will stay in touch and hopefully we can see each other before I leave. Continue reading

The Best Intentions

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You know, I had the best intentions of writing this awesome blog post for today. I let things get in the way and tonight I decided to go out to dinner with friends (old and new), go shopping and then visit with a friend and we chatted the night away while making fun of the people on House Hunters. Sorry my fellow blogging friends but my relationships won over my writing time.

So, this is my lame excuse for a blog post today that I’m going to post 1 minute before midnight.

I promise tomorrow will be a better day!


 

Who else is taking the 28 Day Challenge?

I had a challenge presented to me on January 31 by my friend Sean to blog every day in February to help form the habit of writing on a consistent basis. I took him up on the challenge and will be writing every day in February. 

Day 1

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Please forgive me for my absence in blogging. Last year got away from me and it always makes me a bit sad when I don’t stay on top of my blogging. So, to help me get back in the rhythm I took a challenge from my buddy Sean over at www.seanleacy.com to write every day in February! So, if you don’t see a post from me by 12:00 PM eastern then you have my permission to come find me and yell at me via whatever method we communicate.

So, let’s Continue reading