Have you ever had something happen to you when you were least expecting it and label the event a “coincidence”. Maybe you were feeling down and someone called to ask how you were doing? You’re struggling financially and that bonus or gift shows up unannounced. You feel down on your luck and then suddenly something happens to turn your luck around. Many people call these things coincidences. Things that happen merely by chance. Have you ever thought that it could be God just saying, “Hello.” I am a firm believer that everything, good and bad, happens for a reason. I think my life is living proof of that. Some of the worst situations and events in my life have enabled me to sit here today and be the person I am. Thankfully God gave me an optimistic attitude to help me along the way.
Recently as I’ve been writing “Fitness, Finance and Faith” I’ve been touching on some personal issues in my life. I’ve decided to discontinue “31 Days” as I liked to call it until further notice. A much larger story is playing out in my life right now and I think I’d like to return to my blogging of what is on my heart and mind. If it is fitness, then so be it; finance, great… Right now I have a lot swirling around me spiritually and I’d like to capture some of that and share it with you, my readers (what few are out there). I guess in a sense to return to my “roots of blogging”; to blog about what is going on in life and nothing more. Sure I’m not going to increase readership by the hundreds daily when talking about the personal aspects in life but maybe something I have to share can help someone else along or inspire someone. So, never fear, I’m still keeping up and will do a 31 day summary at the end of the month to let everyone know how I came out and what my thoughts were.
I’ll pickup where I left off in the faith section from 31 days. I did meet with my pastor on Friday. I was late and got to Starbucks and ran inside to find that he just showed up as well (so I didn’t feel terrible). After me being taken back that my pastor rides a Harley Davidson we ordered and sat on the sidewalk in Old Dublin to talk. Now, keep in mind, I’m sitting here thinking that I have no clue what I wanted to ask or say. I asked to meet with him a while back and due to schedules we just couldn’t meet up for two weeks. I seemed to forget my “agenda” I had for the meeting from the day I wrote the letter to actually meeting with Brad, my pastor. I completely believe that was in God’s plan. I was forced to speak from my heart and not mind so we talked.
I noticed that Brad had no agenda either. He simply wanted to talk and see where the conversation lead. After the years of hurt in the church I’ve found it hard to trust pastors. It’s really sad that I feel that way but it is one of those things that after repetitious hurt you form an apprehension when speaking to someone like those from your past. Sitting there I found myself at ease. I easily poured my life out on the table. Sharing everything from my church history to school, family and my life. I listened to Brad as he spoke and he didn’t come across as holier than thou, religious snot, or any other stereotype that you can think of when it comes to “Christians” or “Church-Goers”. Brad came off to me as, human. Human with a heart for people. He actually showed concern and cared about what I had to say. He gave me no “text book” responses but spoke from the heart. Our talk helped me a lot and I continue to relive the moments to think about what was said and continue to pray that God directs me.
From there I spent the weekend helping a friend move. Friday night learned to play the game cornhole. Interjection of humor – I just found out there is an American Cornhole Association – http://www.playcornhole.org/. Please, everyone, take a moment to laugh. Back to the story, so I had a good time and Saturday was a lazy day filled with me coding at home and hanging out with the amazing Katy and doing laundry. Sunday was church and spending time with my family. I found myself going back to church that night to go to the BBQ that the church was having. Now, I’ve only been at the church a few weeks and really don’t know anyone so I figured I’d try this to see if I’d either feel like an outsider or get to know people. Well, everyone will be happy to know that I got to know some of the people from church. I guess most of them attend the early service (9:30 AM) but still it was cool to get to meet them. Talked with my friend Chris and got to hear about some things that God is doing in his life, which I think is awesome.
I still found myself Sunday evening trying to figure out what I’m doing and where I’m going. I think I have a connection at my church and life is changing but I just don’t know where I’m going. It’s one of those, I’m going to walk blind by faith and pray that God leads me where I’m to go. As I continue to toy with this idea in my mind I go to lunch alone today. I couldn’t decide where to go so I figured I’d go to my all time favorite Chinese restaurant on Sawmill, Pei Wei. I get my usual, Honey Chicken with White Rice and a Diet Coke and sit down at my table. I eat my lunch in peace and think about life and what I’m going to do. Lately I think I’ve been chattering too much to hear God. I’m learning how to practice the art of listening to God but it’s a work in progress. I opened my fortune cookie wondering what it would say. When I least expect it I get these small messages… “You do not have to know where you are going to be headed in the right direction.” Only twice this has happened and both times I find myself amazed to find something like this.
Now, I’m not trying to say that God lives in a fortune cookie or makes it His business to speak to His children via Chinese after dinner snacks. I just think that it goes to show that God can speak to us even when we’re not listening. Be it through a song, sermon, Bible, poetry, nature, art or even a fortune cookie… He’s there and He can do it. I’m still learning to let go of the “what direction” and focus on the “next step in front of me” but it takes time. So, for my readers, keep me in your prayers and stick around for the journey. Like my subtitle, I’m looking for life beyond the edge and I think that I’m on the road to find it.
Later,
- JM
