JohnMassie.com

Wow. Great starting off entires like that… Anyways, today has been a really interesting day. Involving many people that (I think) read this journal. So if you’re one of the mentioned people, make sure you post a comment or something! Anyways, onto how the day went…< ?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

 

I get up, go to church to do some work. I go out with my friend Gary and we had a good chat at lunch about a few things. Then I went back to the church to work on some things and then decided I was going to go to SYA (Youth Camp at < ?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />Circleville Bible College) to video tape. I ran into a bunch of old friends. It was good to see them, made me miss them more than I did… Still, it was good to see them and catch up. Funny, only one of them has gotten any taller, just thought I had to throw that in there (Mr. Shelton, that would be you). Ever since I left their church we haven’t talked very much, never hang out, kind of sad really.

 

So then we have a really good service, and I take off to go home. I get home, and talk to mom and grandma a bit. Then I call Brian on the phone and talk for a while about their new minivan that they got tonight (he is soo excited). Then Chad called me and we chatted for bit. Then Brian called back and we talked a little more. Finally I got off of the phone, and got onto the internet.

 

Well, for a while there I stopped talking to my friend, Heather, for no reason. It is a long story, and it would take MANY pages to tell on here, if you are that nosy, ask in person (when you have about 3 hours to talk). Anyways, we’re talking again, thanks to her. She is being very forgiving about the entire situation and I am very thankful for her friendship, and hopefully this time won’t lose it this time. We were talking about tonight and she told me some things about her personal life. Things that aren’t to be told to anyone, notice I am not posting details. Anyways, I said something about her setting a Christ-like example by talking to me. She said that maybe it was. I said, no, it was, without a doubt, a Christ-like example.

 

I continued to preach to her a little bit. She accepted everything I had to say very well. She even asked me to resend her what I said so I guess she could save it. For any of you who are curious as to what I said (preached) to her here it is:

 

“John: Heather, I’ve found out over this past year or so (while we weren’t talking) that everything happens 1. For a reason, 2. By God, 3. In His time. God’s taught me to not only appreciate the people I have, but to appreciate their friendship and the forgiveness that they extend to me. He’s reminded me of how He extended His forgiveness to me, and how when others extended it to me, I should accept it with the same joy and happiness as I do with His forgiveness. I should also accept it with the same thankfulness. I found out that as fast as that friendship can start it can also be ripped from my hands and from my heart and to appreciate every moment I have with someone. So Heather, no deep down, I know that God had you extend your forgiveness to me. Just like God, you could have turned your back on me forever, but you decided you would follow the example you’ve been taught and learned in life. So, don’t cut yourself short, you were ultimately following God’s will for both your life and mine. I am truly grateful of this friendship we’re beginning to work on again, and I want you to see a person that you’ve never seen before. (Well, not completely different, you have to love SOME of my goof ball phrases and acts)….

Heather: I think God grumbles less about it then i do – but I’m glad his gift through me blessed you

Heather: and this John, ultimately, has humility

Heather: Which is something I never saw in you before, yet do now

John: Thank you”

 

 

It was so nice to have such a deep conversation with another person. I would have to be honest in saying it wasn’t the deepest ever, but for people that just started talking a while back, it is pretty deep. So I am very thankful that took place tonight.

 

Well, that is what is going on. Tomorrow I go to the movies, SYA, and orientation for a job next week. Then, Saturday I have to work on editing a video and do tech stuff for a Youth rally in Chillicothe, OH. So, that is going to keep me busy. Then of course there is church on Sunday.

 

Big weekend! I will be running around like mad, so don’t be surprised if my next post isn’t until like Monday… Well, I am going to jet.

 

Later Days,

- J -

If you noticed lately life has been hard. Satan has been fighting me like crazy, and it gets to be physically tiring. I a lot of times I think that God has forgotten me… Even though I know He hasn’t, it just feels like it. Today I prayed that He’d be with me during my all day long exams. They went very easy (Out three hours earlier than the rest of the class), so that said something. Then as I was driving home this song came on the radio and it just hit me:

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More

Matthew West

 

Take a look at the mountain

Stretching a mile high

Take a look at the ocean

Far as your eye can see

And think of Me

 

Take a look at the desert

Do you feel like a grain of sand?

I am with you wherever

Where you go is where I am

 

And I’m always thinking of you

Take a look round you

I’m spelling it out one by one

 

CHORUS:

I love you more than the sun

And the stars that I taught how to shine

You are mine, and you shine for me too

I love you yesterday and today and tomorrow

I’ll say it again and again

I love your more

 

Just a face in the city

Just a tear on a crowded street

But you are one in a million

And you belong to me

 

And I want you to know

That I’m not letting go

Even when you come undone

 

I love you more than the sun

And the stars that I taught how to shine

You are mine, and you shine for me too

I love you yesterday and today and tomorrow

I’ll say it again and again

I love your more

 

I love you more, yeah

Shine for me

Shine for me

Shine, you shine, you shine for me

 

I love you more than the sun

And the stars that I taught how to shine

You are mine, and you shine for me too

I love you yesterday and today and tomorrow

I’ll say it again and again

I love your more

 

I love you more than the sun

And the stars that I taught how to shine

You are mine, and you shine for me too

I love you yesterday and today through the joy and the pain,

I’ll say it again and again

I love you more

I love you more

I see you, and I made you

And I love you more than you can imagine

More than you can fathom

I love you more than the sun

And you shine for me

 

 

I felt like at that moment… God was talking to ME. That song spoke to me on so many levels it wasn’t even funny. I just felt so uplifted by that song. I hope that you all read it and take it to heart.

 

Well, as much as I would love to write a devotional to go with this, it is late, the morning comes early… so I need to sleep.

 

Later,

- J -

Today’s Thought – “What is your picture of rest?”

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Tonight, let’s stop and think about one thing, rest. Sounds good, doesn’t it? Take a moment and think of a picture that to you, represents rest? Obviously none of you are here with me to tell me what your picture of rest is. I will tell you what mine was; an ocean shore where the water is as still as glass. To me at least, that sounds like a great picture of rest. Don’t you agree?

 

That picture only represents stagnation. Confused? So was I at first. Maybe this will help:

“Two painters each painted a picture to illustrate his conception of rest. The first chose for his scene a still, lone lake among the far-off mountains.

 

The second threw on his canvas a thundering waterfall, with a fragile birch tree bending over the foam; and at the fork of the branch, almost wet with the cataract’s spray, sat a robin on its nest.

 

The first was only stagnation; the last was rest.”

- Devotions.org | Streams in the Desert

 

Christ’s life was not an easy life. I’ve many times in life forgotten this. Yes, we all know that the crucifixion wasn’t easy, but I know that many people, me included would say that Jesus for the most part had an easy life. Yet, Christ’s life was one of the most troubled lives ever lived. He faced so much, and was bombarded in life with so many things. Yet on the inside was a sea of glass.

 

We need to also remember that no matter what is happening on the outside that at the moment of Jesus’s name, He’ll provide you His peace, if you believe in Him. This quote describes God’s rest and peace the best:

 

“Rest is not a hallowed feeling that comes over us in church; it is the repose of a heart set deep in God.”

- Drummond

 

So the next time life is going 100 < ?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />MPH and you are ready to give in… remember God will give you peace and rest. I hope that each and every one of you can find that peace in your life.

 

Later Guys,

- J -

Today’s Thought – “Running the Race in Spite of the Storm”< ?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

Welcome to tonight’s entry. Wow, I have a lot to talk about, where to start? So, as you all should have noticed, I’ve posted a “Today’s Thought”, which I do from time to time. Well, life right now is feeling like a race. Think about running, uphill, in the middle of a rain storm. Not easy is it? Right now, that is how my life feels. I’m running and running and feel like I am not getting very far.

My mom and I had a fight about something tonight. It upsets me so much when we fight… I try and make things better afterwards, but never have success. She did the one thing that she taught me not to do, go to bed mad.

I told her I loved her and good night and she more or less looked at me and left to go to bed. I wanted to go in there and hug her and tell her again, but I figured I would only get yelled at, so I didn’t. Then having to make a decision about what college to go to and what not… it just is getting to be a little too much. I have to balance a million things at once and I am running out of time each day to do things. I also am seriously over due for a vacation. I just need some time to get away from everyone and to be able to think… but I don’t see that happening.

 

So, for all you kiddies (and yes, that does include you Tiff, even though we are only a few weeks apart) out there… don’t grow up. As many times as you’ve heard it, take it from someone who is probably just a few months or a year or two older than you. Once you grow up, and begin taking on the responsibilities of an adult… things aren’t as fun as they look.

 

Yes, I do own a car and nice things. I also have monthly payments and have to work each and every day. Yes, that is eight hours a day, five days a week. Once you have worked forty hours a week for almost two years… you get sick of it. Yes, it is nice to have extra cash and have things… but sometimes it can get stressful trying to manage everything.

 

It is amazing to witness satan at work. I had the most spiritual personal conversation with another human being last night. Yes, it was over the internet, but you could still feel the presence of God as we spoke. You know who you are, and I thank you for all that you’ve said to me.

 

Many times I get discouraged for being 17 and never “officially” dated. Have I hung out with girls and we’ve seen each other consecutively, yes. Been in a relationship, no. Yes, for all of you who can put 2+2 together, that means I’ve never kissed anyone or been kissed. I’ve always felt bad about it, but something changed my mind. Thanks to Tiff for these words:

“Just never jump the gun because you think, don’t even jump anything. Wait, wait, and wait. Save yourself all the heartache, you don’t deserve all of it or any of it. Cling to that purity you have, honestly… Stay that way until your wedding day. It will be the most awesome gift ever, even over the whole virgin thing. I completely respect you more than ever right now just for that simple fact, John. Who cares what we (girls) think? Honestly, take pride in what you haven’t done. Sure you’ve had heartache and what not, but I’m sure when you get into that relationship with that person God has for you, you won’t have even half of the things to tell her that you regret that any of the rest of us do…”

 

My whole outlook on the dating situation changed at that moment. Well, then also I’ve been discouraged recently about what kind of Christian walk I have and my Christian life. Tiff also encouraged me with these words:

“You’re such an amazing Christian, not because you’ve grown up that way or whatever but because of who you are. You honestly are amazing. It’s so hard to find Christian guys who are serious about God as much as you are. It’s hard to find adult males even like that. Because you have followed God at such a young age, just imagine some of the things God could do through you.”

 

We really had a deep conversation and then today it was like the devil hit me so hard it wasn’t even funny. I seriously felt physically weak now that the day is over. So, I am just going to pray for strength for the weekend. I need it, and need it bad. I feel so weak right now…

 

So anyways, back to our runner running up hill. I decided on my daily thought by taking several songs and combining their thoughts. So for tonight I leave you with a great (older) song that I listen to during times like these in life…

 

The Anchor Holds

Ray Boltz

 

I have journeyed through the long dark night

Out on the open sea

By faith alone, sight unknown

And yet His eyes were watching me

 

The Anchor holds; though the ship, is battered

The Anchor holds; though the sails are torn

I have fallen on my knees as I face the raging seas

But the Anchor holds in spite of the storm

 

I’ve had visions, I’ve had dreams

Well, I’ve even held them in my hands

But I never knew, those dreams could slip right through

Like they were only grains of sand…

 

(Chorus)

 

Now I have been young, and I am older now

Oh, and there has been beauty these eyes have seen

But it was in the night, where I faced the storms of my life

Oh, that’s where God proved His love to me

 

(Chorus)

 

I have to say all that song is true, I can testify to all of it. So as for running the race in spite of the storm, here is what I have to say. All you can do is slow down and persevere through the storm. It will soon pass and the dry and clear times will be back. If you fall on the wet track, God will be there to stop and pick you up and run with you. Remember, never give up, and you… will never walk (or run) alone…

 

Night Guys,

- J -

Good Evening Everyone,
Ever in life get discouraged? Obviously we all have and it will happen again from time to time until the day we die. Yeah, sounds real encouraging don’t I tonight? Well, things just haven’t been easy. I have to daily remind myself that life won’t always be easy, and it is during these times that things happen on faith, and you just have to trust God.< ?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

Well, I am sittin’ here tonight just messin’ on the computer. If you haven’t already figured it out I have music on whenever I am awake. Thanks to my iTunes software I keep my entire CD collection on the computer and have it shuffle songs. Well tonight I happened to run across a great song.

Directly out of the Psalms is the song:

The Lord is Gracious and Compassionate
Graham Ord

The Lord is gracious and compassionate
Slow to anger and rich in love
The Lord is gracious and compassionate
Slow to anger and rich in love

And the Lord is good to all
And He has compassion
On all that He has made
As far as the east is from the west
That’s how far He has removed
Our transgressions from us

Praise the Lord
Oh my soul praise the Lord
Praise the Lord
Oh my soul praise the Lord

That song is awesome! It reminds me of the simple things that God is. The things that we a lot of times just take for granted. So, stop and take a look at that song.

Well all, I am tired, and I am going to go to bed. I will try and post tomorrow.

Later,
- J -

Hey All,
I talked to someone I used to go to school with. Well, ever done something, then wished you didn’t, well that is how I felt after I talked to her. I don’t need someone like her in my life again. So… I think I’m going to make things go back to the way they were. So, for all you people who still have the Jcm475 screen name, e-mail JComputerGuy@Msn.com… and I will e-mail you back my new AIM Screen Name… As for Tree of Life Students (if any of your browse this), lets just say, don’t bother…

So, just thought I would post that. I don’t have much going on right now. Decided to not go with the job in Cirlceivlle. I have a few new offers in Columbus, and I’ve bid on all of them… So, that is what is going on there.

Well, I am tired, and going to bed…

Later,
J

Well, I got a call back from the company in Circleville. They want to do a phone interview with me tomorrow, I guess that is a good sign. So this will be interesting to see if I get a in person interview and such. So keep me in your prayers.

Also, got some great news! My friend Jen in Virginia invited me to come down to her house in July, so I am going to do just that. That will be awesome. She is also coming up here in early July so I will get to see her twice which is awesome too! So, I am excited about that.

Well everyone, I am going to get off of here and find something to do.

Later,
J

Well, I am going to re-post. My last post kind of told you what bad was going on. Let me tell you though about some of the stuff that God is teaching me, through all those situations.< ?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

 

Well, after posting, I felt kind of down and out. I was going to read my devotional, say a prayer, and then hit the sack. Well, God decided to change my perspective on life. I pulled up my devotion (http://www.devotions.org). Tonight’s devotional is called, Fill The Night With Song. I found that kind of interesting so I decided to choose that one and read on.

 

It was talking about having sleepless nights, and asking God to put a song in your heart. I really think though they are talking about not being at peace in life and asking God to give you a song in your heart to carry you through… Here is what they said:

 

“Is yours the night of discouragement and fancied or actual failure? No one understands you, your friends reproach; but your Maker draws nigh, and gives you a song–a song of hope, the song which is harmonious with the strong, deep music of His providence. Be ready to sing the songs that your Maker gives.”

 

There is exactly what is going on right now. That is how I feel… exactly. I just have to sing the song that God’s placed within me, and I know that everything will be ok.

 

Today in service we sang a new worship chorus, and this is it:

 

Arms of Love

Sing a simple song of love

To my savior, to my Jesus

Grateful for the things You’ve done

My loving savior, my precious Jesus

My heart is glad that You’ve called me Your own

Because there’s no place I’d rather be

 

Than in Your arms of love

In Your arms of love

Holding me still, holding me near

In Your arms of love

 

Gary Ingo spoke today of a woman who was in a car accident. She remembered feeling a hand on her shoulder shortly after the wreck, and she couldn’t figure out who it was. Then as the medics arrived, the hand was gone. They used the jaws of life to remove her from the car, and she realized that that was the hand of God.

 

Sometimes in life we don’t pay attention to the fact that God’s standing there with His arms stretched wide for us to fall in and for Him to hold us. No, we try and stand on our own, and it isn’t until we’ve fallen on our faces and those same arms and hands are picking us up off of the ground.

 

I want to be in the Arms of Love. It is going to be those arms that sustain me, and guide me through life. I know that everything is going to be fine, I just have to give it time. God has a way of working things out.

 

Well, I hope that you all read both posts, they are both very interesting… Please post a comment, drop me an e-mail, or give me a call.

 

God Bless,

J

Good Evening Everyone,
Wow, so I have a lot to post about tonight. Mostly just writing out my thoughts, but that tends to help me sort through things in my life. So you all get the wondrous joy of reading it… Enjoy.< ?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

Well, ever been in a room and you’re listening to people (that you know) talk and what not. Then it seems like time, is frozen. Everything, it just stops (in your mind). Kind of like on TV when they do those weird freeze frames where everyone is still and the main character is the only one that can move and such. Well, that kind of happened tonight. I hung out with some of my friends and it just kind of happened. I feel like I don’t belong.

Well, then tonight sitting at the computer, I did kind of a freeze frame while thinking about all my friends. It hit me that only one person is even born in the same year as me, and we don’t even get to talk that much. I have absolutely no friends that are my age. They are all either younger or older. Kind of makes me sick. I am getting tired of either being the young kid or the old dude.

Sometimes I’ve thought about just starting over in life. Move and leave no forwarding address, and begin a new life in some other state, in some other town. If it wasn’t for my family, I’d probably do just that. *Sigh*… I just don’t know sometimes…

Well, lets see, and then there are always decisions to make. I never know if I am following God’s will, or I am just doing what I want, and then figure out how to justify it… I’ve been offered a job in Circleville, but I don’t know if I should take it. Without me moving down there, it is going to be kind of hard to work and have a life. Then with me going to school; I am going to end up not having a life at all.

So many things to think about… I guess it is just going to be one of those days. Well all, pray for me…

Later,
J

Hey All,
Life is good… Just sittin here takin a break from working on the car. I’ve spent now… Almost seven hours working on that car… This will be the cleanest thing in Columbus… I mean, you can like eat off of my engine now, it is that clean. So, at least it will look nice. I have no place to go in it, but at least it will look nice… hahaha.

Well, I see that school is over for most of you kids . Yes, I can call you kids, I’ve graduated…. finally! It feels like yesterday mom was walking me into Kindergarten; now I am all grown up and out of school.

So anyways, drop me a line, comment, or give me a call…

Later,
J