JohnMassie.com

 

Quote of the day: “I really thought I’d just hit rock bottom. But today, it’s like there’s rock bottom, fifty feet of crap, then me.” Rachel Green – Friends TV Series.< ?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

 

I must say that; earlier this week, I thought I’d hit rock bottom, but truly I feel as if there is rock bottom, fifty feet of crap, then me. Things just aren’t looking up at the moment, but I guess I have to hold on. I’ve gone through these things in the past, and you just have to wait them out.

 

I am trying to be optimistic in a lot of gloom and doom. Being between contracts isn’t fun. I have like 6 or so that are pending, but I have to wait for all the paper work before I can start. So until then I have no income, and have to live off of what was left from my last contract. Well, you would know that the small crack in my windshield that I was getting ready to have repaired, went clear across it (new windshield now, instead of repair), I have two tires with leaks, my other car has a flat, and my grandma’s car (which I borrow from time to time) is having muffler issues. Then, I’m having some serious issues with some of my friends, which is never fun. I am trying to get money to drive to Circleville for church with gas prices at $2.15+. Also… there is a bunch of stress with owning your own company, which is driving me crazy. I feel distant from God, and it is just really really really CRAPPY right now.

 

Oh wait, then I sign into a really OLD screen name of mine. I am browsing through some names and see this guy I used to know. Great Christian kid, wait well he is like 21, so kid wouldn’t fit him…. but anyways… he drinking now, cursing, and just kind of did a 180 in the wrong way. This didn’t make me feel any better. I found out by browsing through his blog. Yeah, so that makes me just feel so great inside.

 

I must say one thing though. Through all this crap, one thing came to mind today. I was sitting feeling crappy and this song came to mind:

 

He Will Carry You

Mark Schultz

 

I call, You hear me

I’ve lost it all

And it’s more then I can bear

I feel so empty

 

Your strong, I’m weary

I’m holding on

But I feel like giving in

But still You’re with me

 

(Pre-chorus and Chorus)

And even though I’m walking

Through the valley of the shadow

I will hold tight to the hand of Him

Who’s love will comfort me

And when my hope is gone

And I’ve been wounded in the battle

He is all the strength that I will ever need

He will carry me

 

I know I’m broken

But You alone

Can mend this heart of mine

Your always with me

 

And even though I’m walking

Through the valley of the shadow

I will hold tight to the hand of Him

Who’s love will comfort me

And when my hope is gone

And I’ve been wounded in the battle

He is all the strength that I will ever need

He will carry me

He will carry me

 

(Bridge)

And even though I feel so lonely

Like I have never been before

You never said it would be easy

But You said You’d see me through the storm

 

And even though I’m walking

Through the valley of the shadow

I will hold tight to the hand of Him

Who’s love will comfort me

And when my hope is gone

And I’ve been wounded in the battle

He is all the strength that I will ever need

He will carry me

He will carry me

He will carry me

 

That gives me some encouragement. So I guess I’ll be ok. I hope that everyone has a safe Memorial Day weekend. Leave me a comment, drop me a line, or give me a call.

Later,

J

Good Evenin Everyone,
Life is going well at the moment. Kind of stressful but other than that, ok. For tiff’s benifit, God’s teaching me a lot, and I’ll post on that later. I just throught I would put a post on here to let you all know that I am alive. I will try and post again before bed.

Later,
J

Welcome everyone,
I had a good weekend this weekend. Kind of nerve racking, but other than that, it was good. I ended up talking for over an hour to my friend about what he told me, and that went well. I am glad to find out what I found out. I’ve truly found a good friend.

I’ve been staying at my friend’s parents house while they are away on vacation. It is fun living on your own. I survived the big storm we had on Friday, with little clean up needed on their lot, so that is good.

Well, I am at the annual church board meeting, and will post later when I get home.

See ya,
J

By popular demand (Tiffani…), I am going to post tonight about what God is teaching me. There are a few things that God is teaching me right now. The first is the desire for Genuine Worship.

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When thinking about Genuine Worship; I am reminded of the song, Heart of Worship. This expresses what every Christian should desire. To forget about the corporate act of worship, and to strip everything of them and come back to the “heart” of worship; back to genuine, real, worship.

 

The one thing about Crossroads; is that our people have become so comfortable with their worship, and when we mix it up, they don’t participate. These people are singing like robots or like people held at gunpoint. They do it as an act and not as an expression.

 

God’s teaching me to have a spirit of genuine worship. Last Sunday on a local radio show, I heard a Worship Leader describe it this way, “When we worship, we are painting a picture, as one. We are helping cover the earth in praises and worship to God. Whether it is our worst service, we still are worshipping God.”

 

God is working on this attitude in my life, to forget everything that is going on and to focus on worshipping my creator. For the few who read this, stop and think about that. When we worship, we are entering the presence of a God who controls this universe. A God who personally knows each and everyone of us by name. He sustains us each day, yet we don’t have time to worship him, and attempt to return our gratitude.

 

Also, God is beginning something different in my life. I had a friend of mine tell me something this evening, which kind of took me buy surprise. Not to sound fanatical or anything, but I don’t believe it was at all by accident that they told me. I believe it was for a reason, and now I feel as if I need to talk with them about it.

 

It is a confusing situation and I am not sure how to approach it with them again. So, if you are reading this, person who told me something on Wednesday night at church, and said I was the only one who knew, then jump me about it, when you have some time to talk, and we’ll talk, because there are a few things that I would like to discuss with you.

 

Well, I hope that is a good enough update for you all. God teaching me a lot, and I will have more to share as I continue to learn. Well, leave me a comment, tell me what you think.

 

Later days,
J

Hello Everyone,< ?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

Well, looking at the sitemeter I noticed we have some new people visiting the site:

Wide Open West

< ?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />AOL

RoadRunner

MECDC.Net

 

So, all you people who are reading this, I’ll give you a chance to fess up and reveal yourselves. Just drop me a comment or drop me an e-mail at jcomputerguy@msn.com. I just like to know who’s browsing around.

 

So, onto tonight’s post… Well, I can’t complain about life. Interviewing for two positions at Abbot Labs (Ross Labs), Desktop Support Technician and Level 2 Help Desk Technician. I am pretty excited; should pay well too. I see a new vehicle in my future… . (Yes, for all of those who know me all too well, I know I have only owned my car for 6 months, but I want a change…).

 

So, lets see, in the dating area, still single. Could date, but don’t… Life is going to be extra busy here the next week or so. My partner in crime at church is taking a vacation, so I get to take over everything for a week and half, which is going to be real fun. So, if ya all need to get a hold of me, give me a call on my cell phone.

 

Well, I need to sleep…

Nite Everyone,

J

Evenin’ All,

Have you ever had God put you in your place? I am sure that you all have in one way or another. Well, God decided to stick it to me the other night. I was complaining about being at this church function, to just play music videos… Well, I sat upstairs and did some work, and then it came time for them to close in Worship. (By the way, I was complaining because there was only like 25 people there, and in my opinion, they didn’t need me.) So anyways, I was kind of in this “I’m-put-out-but-I-Am-Going-To-Act-Like-I-Am-Not” mood. We began to sing the song “Heart of Worship”. Well, started singing, and then came to the following part:

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When the music fades,

All is stripped away,

And I simply come.

Longing just to bring,

Something that’s of worth,

That will bless your heart.

 

Then…

 

I’m coming back to the Heart of Worship

And it’s all about you, all about you, Jesus

I’m sorry Lord for the thing I made it

When it’s all about you, it’s all about you, Jesus

 

I stopped, and looked at the words, and I felt that God put me in my place. Then looking down at the sound board, this came to mind:

 

My mission, as a Technical Arts volunteer is this:

To serve the body of < ?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />Crossroads Church by providing quality audio and video reinforcements at all major church-wide events. To raise up people of Godly character who anonymously work to build a platform of audio/visual support to assure that those teaching the Word of God can be clearly seen and heard.

 

So anyways, God’s taught me a lesson, that I don’t plan on forgetting. I thought that I would share it with you all.

 

Night,

J